posting is getting harder and harder

so my sis reminded me that i'm not posting - the truth is things are so crazy that i'm sure to be committed if anyone actually reads this stuff - let's see God is doing so much - so much painfully hard stuff - i'm in the center of a very difficult trial and the enemy is throwing deception everywhere - now don't get me wrong i am completely aware that the enemy can not do a thing without permission from our great God but it does make it hard to discern every step along the way - i feel like i'm in the center of the greatest chess game ever - satan makes his move - God makes his - and so on and so on - it is an honor to stand firm in praying, watching the powerful Hand of our Creator do what only he can do - but it is hard - it's hard to be painfully reminded that at any moment i can be used as a tool of the enemy if i let my guard down - through all of this through the Bible I have been reminded that the after math of a battle is often the hardest part - how things get handled is key - praying and fasting have been my life this past month - pray walks which i had never done before have become a new understanding for me - i think the hardest thing that i have had to do was fast from my words - cut me at the core of who i am - which is exactly why It was necessary - one thing i would like to say is i have been in His Word day and night and He has shown me so much - it's as if the flood gates of His Word has been open in a powerful way for me - how faithful our Lord is to speak when we chose to listen - i gotta run - i will try to get back to this later tonight