Happy Birthday Drew - You're 4 !!!! Nov. 24th

I can't believe it's been 4 years ago that Mommy had her car crash and you had to come as an emergency C-section. WOW time sure flies and now you are the sweetest little guy. I love you so much and am so very thankful you love me back. If Mommy were here instead of Heaven she would love you up real good but you will have to be satisfied with all of us loving you up instead. Always remember how much she loves you and that she is so proud of you. You will forever be "her man". Jesus has such great plans for you Drew. You are fearfully and wonderfully made and everything about you is exactly what our Good Lord Jesus intended so that He can use you in all the many ways He has planned for you. Drew you are a gift and I love you so very much. Happy Birthday big guy.

xoxoxo

under the glass bowl

So some of YOU asked what is that under the glass bowl. It's a killing monster - a lizard!
The picture is symbolic to me, although quit dumb to everyone else I'm sure. You see the day that I took that picture I actually captured that beast myself. To know me is to know that any time there is a monster in my house I toss a bowl on top of it so that my dear heroic husband will know that he must protect his families lives and destroy whatever might be under the bowls. Such bravery should be rewarded. O wait it is he gets me!!!!!!! Now one more thing I can not find a word in Webster's to describe how I feel about the dreaded monster known to others as the lizard. Just typing that word makes me have a little something come up in my mouth. Don't say gross, you wanted to know what was under the glass bowl................ This day i was in the middle of walking through a very difficult trial. I awoke, prayed God's armor on and put my feet to the ground. Walked through the dining room to see IT - there IT was under my table surely planning his attack of eating my head off. UGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH! I must have been on auto pilot because I went in the kitchen grabbed a large glass bowl. Not sure why I didn't use the big giant Tupperware bowls that i always use but anyway I stepped towards it - O YES I DID - You should have seen me the bravery was astounding. I came within about 1 foot of the killing machine and dropped the bowl on it. VICTORY - I"M A ROCK STAR !!!! I slayed the beast - ok at least trapped it. But he was now going down - death would surely be in the near future for this one once the Gladiator man of the house came home. Okay fine he may have only been 4 inches at best ( if Bobby measured him) but i will tell you he was 35 feet long and I trapped him. So the heroin went about her morning. Now the disturbing part of this is when you use a glass bowl, you have this high need to look at it. Brushing my teeth - wait go peak on the monster. Sitting outside doing my study - go check on the monster. making Aaron's protein shake - stop midway and check the lockness nelly. You get he picture I was obsessed with looking at this thing that i was terrified of. Then it hit me. why do I keep looking at the very thing that I'm terrified of. it can't get me. it can't get out of the bowl. I'm free from it. Why give it this power over me of obsessing about it and still being afraid - IT WILL NOT KILL ME. I was giving this thing way to much power over me. God is there He will never allow anything to come across my path that He hasn't put there and if I trust Him than what's up with this fear thing. I was now good to go tackle whatever God was surely going to bring across my path that day. ........i never got to see how the Gladiator got rid of that monster but he did and even in that it's pretty profound as to when we get the right perspective the thing of fear seems to just disappear.

YOU ASKED

Twilight Review

so first let me say that I am 1000% NOT endorsing this movie / book at all. I am going to post the below review because I think it is one of the best out there that does not take a side. It clearly gives all of the facts. Trust me the facts alone should make you have clarity on this subject. So why post it if I am already not for this movie? the answer is because I really want you to read it. The review that is. To ask God what He thinks? Is this entertaining the World? Does it give a little bit of glamore to the whole under world of Goth / Vampires? Do you even know that it is a very real and growing pod that is worshiping Satan? If I accept this at what point will I say "no more"? is there even a point that I will ever even say no more, or have we truly gotten to the place that our tolerance will destroy us? Is it weird that one might see or read Twilight and actually root for these two to "hookup" sexually - don't even get me off on that road of immorality? a million questions I could post before showing the review but for now I pray you will read and allow the Lord to open the eyes of your hearts to truth and not to be lead into deception by the "great con artist"


I'd never given much thought to how I would die."
So begins one of the most resonant love stories to touch teen culture in quite some time. Love, found in a world filled with terrifying monsters in the moonlight. Love, found at a strange high school in a tiny, rainy town that Bella Swan did not want to live in. Love, found by a cold-blooded vampire who didn't think he would ever feel warmth again. Love, found by both of them to be intoxicating to the point of creating near giddy insanity.
Bella moves to Forks, Wash., to live with her dad after her divorced mother remarries. She thinks of it as an exile. Certainly she doesn't think anything good will come of it. She's from Phoenix, and she hate the cold and rain. She's a high school junior, so she doesn't relish the idea of starting over at a new school. She's uncertain about her relationship with her dad.
But she fits in better than she anticipates. Or at least she thinks she does until she meets Edward Cullen. Butterflies start circling in her stomach the moment she sees him, but all he does is glare at her. It might take a while to smooth out the bumps, but Bella's determined to make it work with her white-faced dreamboat.
So determined, it turns out, that even when she learns that he's a bloodsucking vampire, she's unwavering in her newfound infatuation. "You don't scare me," she tells him repeatedly, almost as if she's trying to convince herself along with him.
Her resolve is continually tested as she learns that it's all he can do to resist the desire to kill her, as she meets his intimidating family of vampires, and as she becomes the target of a nomadic "tracker" vamp, who's decided she's the endgame of an eternal lifetime. But love is love, she figures, no matter the risk. And therein lies the heart and soul of Twilight—exhibited in both grand and shocking ways.
Family is a big part of what nurtures Twilight's love. Edward's coven—family—of vampires is a loving one. Each member is committed to protecting the others, even Bella when she becomes part of them through her relationship with Edward.
The Swans, while more fragmented, still show a great deal of cohesion demonstrated through selflessness. Dad opens his arms and home to Bella after years of separation. Uncomfortable at first, Bella tries to give him a fair shake when she arrives. And she does everything in her power to make sure that when her life is threatened, Dad doesn't become collateral damage.
Superlatively, Bella willingly offers herself as a sacrifice meant to save her mom's life. She narrates, "Dying in the place of someone I loved seemed like a good way to go."
Accepting, for a moment, the idea that vampires can exist in a fantasy world and that they are capable of making "moral" choices within the framework of their predetermined natures, it would be fair to say that the Cullen clan's choice to avoid killing humans is ... positive. Edward explains to Bella that they are "vegetarians," meaning that they have learned to survive on the blood of animals. Beyond being grateful that she's not going to be devoured mere moments after falling in love for the first time in her life, Bella interprets this as them being "good" vampires who have struggled, some for centuries, to renounce their evil inclinations.
So within the context of a monster mash such as this, we can see a reflection of the Christian calling to put away the old man of sin and embrace the new one—a path that while straight and narrow, is certainly more difficult to walk.
Edward and Bella don't talk about it much, but it is intimated that despite their ability to choose good over evil, Edward considers himself and all other vampires to be eternally damned, and he resists mightily the idea of allowing Bella to descend into the abyss that he finds himself submerged in. She doesn't care a whit about that. She's eager to become a "cold one" if only it means she will be with her beau forever.
Edward can read minds. His sister, Alice, sees visions of the future.
Clearly tempted to go farther, Edward wrenches himself away from Bella after they begin kissing. (Before he does so, they embrace, eagerly lock lips and slowly lower themselves onto her bed.) There's a pro-abstinence message in his decision to disengage, but it's muddied by a couple of facts: 1) He's avoiding sexual contact because he knows it will cause him to want to kill her, not because he believes the contact itself would be immoral in any way. 2) He says he's been in the habit of sneaking into her window at night and watching her sleep. And once he admits that to her—and she doesn't run screaming, calling him a creepy stalker—he proceeds to spend the night with her in her bed (clothed, but cuddling).
Dialogue dips into the sexual arena when Edward tells Bella what people at a restaurant are thinking about. He grins, looking around the room and saying, "Money, sex, money, sex, cat." Mom asks Bella if she's "being safe." There's a quick joke about a swim team's padded Speedos.
Girls at school wear tops that expose a bit of cleavage. And prom dresses—Bella's included—reveal even more.
The first question a colleague asked me when I returned to the office after seeing Twilight was, "Were there any gory vampire bites shown in the movie?" It's a fair question, and it probably mirrors what a whole host of parents began wondering the moment after a whole host of Kaitlins and Ashleys started begging to go see it.
The answer is yes.
In flashback, we watch Carlisle "create" Edward by biting down into his neck. There's no blood visible in this "transformation," but there is in other vampire attacks. Bella's hand is slashed in a fight with the tracker vamp, and he ultimately bites her, too. This takes place in the midst of a frenetic battle that starts with just Bella and the tracker, and ends up a full-scale melee involving Edward, Jasper and Alice. The tracker's head is twisted nearly off (onscreen) before he's disassembled and burned in a fire (mostly offscreen or out of focus).
Bella is hurled across a room; she slams into a mirrored wall. The tracker breaks her leg by stomping on it. When Edward tears into the rival vampire, they all but destroy the building they're in, blasting through floors, walls, windows, etc.
When Bella does a bit of Web research on the "cold ones," we watch over her shoulder as she sees drawings and cinematic images of bloody killings. We see flashes from contemporary vampire assaults, too; these hint at the violence that transpires rather than fully expose it.
To save Bella's life, Edward sucks her blood from the puncture wound the tracker inflicted, drawing the venom back out of her. And it's not the only time she's in danger: When the Cullens first meet the tracker, they square off in threatening, animalistic crouches to defend her. When a careening van veers toward Bella, Edward stops it with his hand. And when a small group of ne'er-do-wells accosts Bella in an alleyway, she's crowded and threatened before Edward swoops to the rescue. (To his credit, he resists the urge to kill the men.)
In a sequence used to illustrate a lie told about how Bella got hurt, we see her tumble down stairs and smash through a large window.
One exclamatory use of "h---." "Oh my god" is interjected a handful of times. There's a line about a "butt-crack Santa."
Bella's dad downs beer on several occasions. In one scene we see him pile two six-packs onto a friend's lap. Edward refers to Bella as his "own personal brand of heroin."
To protect his vampiric identity, Edward has cultivated the fine art of lying. Bored with safe driving rules, he speeds and executes fancy—difficult and dangerous for us mere mortals—quick-turn tricks.
In a ploy to try to protect him from the vampires, Bella reluctantly, yet intentionally, wounds her father with words her mother used when they divorced.
There are two kinds of people who will watch Twilight: Those who have read the books ... and those who haven't. The two groups will see a very different movie. The latter will casually make its way through a romance-obsessed vampire yarn involving a human high school girl and a 17-year-old vampire who's actually over 100. The former will observe the very same romance, but layer onto it the entire story arc that unfolds through the four Stephenie Meyer novels that have birthed this movie franchise.
That makes it difficult to write just a movie review about a movie that isn't just a movie, but rather part of tall tale that doesn't end at twilight, or even the dark of night. It goes beyond into the realm of the eternal—something not really hinted at onscreen ... yet.
I'll give you an example of how Twilight neophytes and Twi-hards, as they're starting to be called online, will react differently as the film unspools: When Jacob shows up for the first time, he's ostensibly a minor character who, along with his wheelchair-bound dad, is delivering an old truck that Bella's father bought for her. OK, fine, right? No big deal. But when he first peeks his head onto the screen, a portion of the audience—primarily female, for the record—is likely to erupt with squeals of delight. They certainly did at the advance screening I attended. Why? Because Jacob eventually becomes A) Bella's best non-Edward friend, B) a shapeshifting wolf and C) a hunk.
Fans of the books clearly weren't there to just see a movie. They were there to experience the thrill of "meeting" their favorite characters in all their huge, big-screen glory. This says a lot about how much impact Meyer's story is having. Readers—and now moviegoers—are soaking in everything she's written, taking it to heart and wearing it, quite literally, on their sleeves.
One Twilight T-shirt being sold (and which I saw at the movie) proclaims, "Forbidden Fruit Tastes the Best." And that's certainly one of the film's underlying themes. This isn't about me beating up Twilight for being about vampires, though. There are positives in it that bear repeating: The Cullens refuse to be party to murder even when it's their "nature" to kill and feed off humans. Edward consistently controls his own blood lust around his classmates and especially around Bella. He cares for her. He protects her. Bella offers up her life for her mom.
But there's enough negative undercurrent even in this first outing (the books get darker as they progress, so presumably the movies will follow) to justify some pretty serious conversations afterwards for those families that decide to defer their better judgment—which would normally push vampire flicks out of bounds—and go ahead and go with the flow and see the show. The positivity of Edward and Bella's abstinence needs to be tempered with a discussion about what's so very wrong with them "sleeping" together and him sneaking into her room. His resistance to turning her into a vamp must be contrasted with her desperate desire to become one. Her obvious love for her father needs to be stacked up next to her willingness to deceive him both when his life depends on it and when it just suits her romantic desires.
Bella finds herself inexorably drawn to the "bad boy," and she does little to resist. She calls herself a "stupid lamb" (and there's already a T-shirt out there that splashes the phrase across its front), refusing to wise up for fear that clarity might mean her heart will be broken. Indeed, she waves away Edward's objections as if they were just annoying mosquitoes buzzing around her head.
We know that he doesn't want to hurt her. But she doesn't.
There's an important life lesson lurking in Bella's obstinance. But don't look for Twilight to unpack it for you. It's too dizzy from breathing in the heady fragrance of heedless and headstrong young love.

so tell me what you think - don't worry I'll never be offended if you post your real opinion and I disagree - I'll just pray for you ;0)

remember to keep chasing righteousness!!!

so this is what bobby does at retreat with pastor maury and david hocking

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY AND GRANDPA

Not that my Daddy would ever see this post I am still compelled to wish him a Happy Birthday and thank him for being the greatest Daddy ever. I love you Daddy! Kiss Mom for me and tell her that I love her.

Faith

the life of Aaron

Paintball is what this is. All over his body and he and his Dad do this by choice. I'm completely sure that this is some form of child abuse.

Handsom man - he wanted to wear a tie for Donna's memorial.

Get up in the morning and snuggle on the couch with Geoffrey. Sweetie babies!!!

So Now What?

First, I praise God for the victories that we did have:
Thank You Jesus for Prop 8 winning YES - there are others ut this one was a biggie for me.

2nd - I praise God for the disappointments:
Praise You Jesus that You see that it is better for Your ultimate plan for us in America for Obama to be our President. You see it all from beginning to end and in that I trust You and know that You still are working a good plan.

Just a thought - If this decision is going to bring the Christian community back to church, back to praying, back to fearing God then of course this is the better decision. We need to always remember, God's ways are not our ways. We seek comfort and easy life.( even though we won't admit that) He desires bended knees and prostrate hearts at any cost. So I'll ask you the very hard question - Did it work? if not I wonder what it will take for God to get His people to have bended knees and prostrate hearts.

VOTE!!!!!

if you are 18 or older, an American citizen, are not in jail, or you are not on probation from a felony ( i think that's what it is) - GO VOTE

You see I live by this rule that you do not EVER get to have an opinion about politics or how the United States is or isn't dealing with something, if you don't vote, you don't get to have an opinion. Harsh you may say. Okay you're right but it's truth.

Now I would sit here and tell you that you need to be voting for McCain and not Obama and the many truthful reason why but I'm sure you have already decided where you will place your vote and nothing I say will change that.

One little thing - if Obama is our next President at the end of this day and you picked him, please just don't sit around over the next 4 years and act surprised when the change he talks about is not what you thought it would be. There has been much well documented information of who this man is. Yes much of the Internet forwards have been false, you only need to check snopes.com to see what is tru and what is not however, so has much of the ones regarding Palin and McCain.
okay I can't close this without a few questions:
health care reform - so what happens to the millions of unemployed high payed medical professionals? what jobs can they go get? where do they live when their homes are repo'd? What does it really look like to have the govt dictate our health care? they've done such a great job with everything else they've controlled (that was sarcasm).
More rights for Gays - first let me say I have some dear friends that I love very much that live this lifestyle however - the Word of God is abundantly clear here - besides, good grief this is a sexual orientation not a race of people - so what's next my neighbor being able to marry his dog? sound stupid? okay it is, that's the point. Truth is my heart breaks for those that find themselves in this confusion in their heads of what they want sexually. This will be unpopular but I'll say it anyways - DENY THE FLESH - as just about perfect as my wonderful husband is I'm not foolish to think that he has never looked at another women in the past 19 years and maybe even for if just but a moment thought something. So should he have the right to act on that desire? yes he has free will, we all do, God gives it to us but that doesn't mean it's what's best. There is consequence to sin. No my husband would deny his flesh. Self Control. Please know that I only used my husband as an example because if I would have used yours you would have really been mad. ;0)
maybe a more simple way to think of it is having an over hormonal teenager who you are teaching to deny the flesh and stay pure - same thing ya'll.

The War - this is a loaded one - I will make this very very brief - I will watch. How stupid would either of these men be to show our enemies our complete poker hand and give a time frame of when we will move out. People please we don't need to know everything because if we know it so does our enemy. Have you ever thought about how secretive our enemies are?????

If you have lasted with this post all the way through you will be so very blessed because I have saved the very best for last.

God Is Sovereign STILL!!!!

doing the wrong thing

So this is supposed to help me process or in our new word ‘percolate’. Most of this won’t make sense to you all so you might just want to skip it and just go to one of the other blogs that people actually sound sane.
So this grieving thing is really confusing. Things that should make me cry don’t and things that seem like nothing do. It seems like every time I need to have a melt down, there before me is a huge opportunity to minister to someone. Truth is in the moment I feel at peace and full of joy and know that I am honored to still be used by God. Well today was no different except that the end result was well not sure I know an appropriate word for it. Today was our Leader’s ministry teams annual picture. I was really struggling with this one. How can I take a picture with out Donna? You see her and I often had, let’s call them conversations regarding the picture. Stupid conversations that made us crack up. I had all this anxiety about the picture (missing Donna). SO I had this fantastic idea that I would leave as soon as 2nd service worship was over and no one would see me leave and I would easily just be another gal that couldn’t make it. So I was sneaking out and I ran to potty real quick. There was a HUGE need, a sweet beautiful servant from children’s ministry crying really really hard. I helped her to the CM office so that I could love on her and pray for her. An hour later my window of opportunity was gone. When I came out of the office many of my favorite faces were there waiting for the team picture. Feeling like I was about to emotionally breakdown crying I knew I couldn't have them be there for me as they were just about to have their picture done, I chose to leave abruptly. What could I do, I couldn’t sit there and fall apart – nor could I pull myself together. I know I would disappoint Lori in leaving like I did but good grief there was no right answer. I needed to get to my home to fall apart alone. To find my Jesus in all these tears.
I needed to read the story of Miriam’s death and how Moses couldn’t grieve because there was ministry to do. Something like that I knew of the story. I just knew that I seemed to identify with Moses in this and I wanted to see what God was trying to speak to my heart about.
Numbers 20.
So there it was Miriam’s death and nothing else mentioned about it. Moses was instantly thrown into the needs of others. However, I noticed that this time in his meeting the needs of the children of Israel his methods were fleshlier and he put his self in with the category of God. The Word says
Num 20:9-11
So Moses took the rod from before the LORD, just as He had commanded him; 10 and Moses and Aaron gathered the assembly before the rock. And he said to them, "Listen now, you rebels; shall we bring forth water for you out of this rock?" 11 Then Moses lifted up his hand and struck the rock twice with his rod; and water came forth abundantly, and the congregation and their beasts drank.
We know the end result was that because he did what he should not have done; God did not permit him to go into the promise land. But I was thinking what happened to Moses? Why did he lump himself in with God? Why did he strike the rock when he was told to speak to it? And I began to see it because I can see in myself this selfishness of wanting to grieve my way and yet every turn I make there is yet another need to be met. Why can’t I trust my Lord with this process? Trusting that He is saving me from myself, knowing the dark place I could go to if left to my own means and that these opportunities are actually me living out everything that I have ever studied and have been so blessed by in the Word. If I but chose this road with God I will have grieved in the way God can use best in my life. Today I failed. But confession to God and out here in cyber space I have made. Forgive me Lord Jesus for thinking I know best.

Yes A Trash Can