leaning on my staff

It seems like a year has gone by since I've last blogged. Okay fine it's only been a couple of weeks but so much in my heart and mind has happened that it's hard to know what exactly I should share.
Thanksgiving - I loved reading all the blogs with so many things to be thankful for. Beautiful and exactly how God intends for us to live. Being Thankful and Praising our King.

Originally Thanksgiving was supposed to be me cooking over at Donna's for her and her family. That's what we've done in the past and it's always perfect. Me cooking and everyone eating. This year of course it became obvious that things may not go as Donna and I had planned. When all was said and done We stayed home and had family(in Jesus) over, the Fambroughs. I got to cook which always makes me happy. We had a really nice day. The day was flooded with memories of Donna for me and so many things to be thankful for in the years I had with her. As eating and laughter and football games could be heard I was so thankful that life goes on and God still has a plan. I'm still useful to Him even without my "SuperChica". The Thompson's went to some good friends house down in south county. As much as I had hoped they would come by the house here I knew that Tony now needs to make new memories and do what's best for him and the kids. One last thing about Thanksgiving I made the yummiest Turkey(s). ;0)

Lessons being learned in the Word: So many to share but first I need to confess that I had not been in the Word for the past 3 days. So before sharing all the things that God has been teaching me I need to be honest and admit that I had not been truly ABIDING in the Lord. Then I wondered why I was having hard days falling into overindulgent behaviors. Good grief how sad that it took me 3 days to figure that out. You know I always find it funny how someone can share about how difficult of a life they are having. Honoring God, Honoring their Husbands, being careful with their Words, serving in the flesh, getting iiritated with co-workers, family members, neighbors, struggling with drugs, drinking, bulimia, sexual sin etc... than you ask them, 'are you Abiding really abiding in all that incubuses that word' and quess what the answer is?????............ DING DING DING DING!!!! you're right the answer is NO. So guess what the solution is???? ......see how smart you are, you know the answer. Well for me I fell into this trap the past 3 days and made some very fleshly purchases. Once again setting consequences into play that I will regret. Okay confession time out of the way. Let me share one of the really great things I have learned recently from the Word of God.
So we have been studying Hebrews in 'k' group. Here is one of my applications:

Hebrews 11: 20-21
20 By faith Isaac blessed Jacob and Esau, even regarding things to come. 21 By faith Jacob, as he was dying, blessed each of the sons of Joseph, and worshiped, leaning on the top of his staff.
Observation/Application: ( I will give you the shortened version as I'm sure you don't have another 30 min. to read)
I want to take note of how Jacob died – he was worshipping and leaning on his staff – of all of Jacobs life this is the thing that merits mention in the Hall of Faith – his end. Wanting to have a better understanding of the significance of leaning on his staff I began to study and mediate on what the symbolism was. I'm sure there are many great Bible study teachers that have some great stuff on this but this is what God spoke to my heart, for my life. I imagine Jacob acquired that staff in his wrestling with God season. Having to use the staff must have become a necessity for him at that point. With his hip broken and all. So from that point to his death he had this reminder of that season in his life of wrestling with God. I see a man of complete surrender to the Lord here as he leans on his staff making acknowledgement of the consequence, accepting it and praising God through it. A pure heart of surrender. I pray that this is what can be mentioned of me in the end of my life that I accepted the consequences that I set into motion. Not trying to hide them but a true acknowledgment that God is a just God and He is praise worthy always. Me in my flesh will put things in motion that I can not take back to take those things and allow God to use them for His glory in my life is all that He desires. Jacob is demonstrating this very act here in his death.

Are there consequences from your sin that you are having to live with right now that cripple you and seem to make you useless to God. Well my blogger friends let me tell you that you are believing a lie. Repent of the sin and accept what God has allowed into your life because of it and find a way to praise God in it and through it.

My beginning life with my husband, before we were married was one of complete sin. He was a Jehovah's Witness and I was a back slidden Christian. Now by Gods abundant grace and mercy our faithful Lord has redeemed and restored the two of us. The life we live in Jesus is a beautiful one that is rich with serving, blessings and covering from our King. However, neither Bobby nor I are so ignorant to miss the truth that the things in our marriage that are challenging are a direct link to the consequences that we set in motion before our complete surrender to Jesus days. I hate the things that are hard for us but some how in understanding why they are there and giving it to a mighty God, I accept and praise through it. Those issues will always be there I get that but God can still use it and bless us inspite of it.

May my end tell of me worshipping my Jesus and leaning on my staff!